The Unknown Caller

I woke up today at 10:30 because it’s Saturday and that’s what the working class should be doing over the weekend — sleeping.

At 11:35, I receive a call.

Now, I’m not one to pick up calls. I hate the concept of calling. They should’ve banned phone calls the day texting was invented. So naturally, I stared at my phone screen until the call became “missed.”

The very next second, the number called again.

Now, the weird part wasn’t that the number wasn’t saved in my phone. I recently got a new phone and because I had Truecaller on my old one, I never really bothered saving contacts.

The weird part was that the number showed a name.

Vinay Sah.

I don’t even have Truecaller on this phone.

But Android does this thing sometimes where random numbers show up with names attached to them. A colleague of mine once showed up as “IHRC Services” on my phone and neither of us knows why. So I figured maybe this was just another Android mystery.

The second call kept ringing.

At this point I thought maybe it was someone I knew whose number I hadn’t saved yet, so I picked up.

“Hello?” I said.

Silence.

For a few seconds, all I could hear was background noise and faint voices.

Then suddenly, a man goes:

“Hallooo… hallooo…”

In the thickest Bihari accent imaginable.

“Hello?” I repeated.

Again:

“Hallooo…”

That’s it. Just elongated hallos floating through my speaker like a haunted Nokia ringtone.

I cut the call.

Now, if you’re unaware, scam and fraud calls are getting increasingly creative and technologically advanced. So if a random caller is behaving strangely, it’s probably smarter to not stay on the call long enough to find out what new cybercrime DLC they’ve unlocked.

Anyway, I thought that was the end of it.

Until almost an hour later, the same number called again.

I declined it.

He called again immediately after.

This time I picked up thinking maybe it was just some delivery guy struggling with directions.

Same script.

Silence.

“Hallooo…”

I disconnected within eight seconds because no delivery person in history has ever wasted time like this. Delivery men begin conversations mid-breath:

“Madam gate kholo neeche hoon.”

This man sounded like he was trying to communicate with me through a foggy dimension portal.

He called again immediately.

I declined again.

Now my mind was going everywhere.

And listen — I’m a little stupid online sometimes.

If I see an Instagram ad, I click it.
Cute stationery website? Click.
Lip gloss? Click.
Tiny business selling aesthetically packaged highlighters? Click.

Sometimes I even make accounts on these sites.

So naturally my brain went:

Congratulations. You’ve finally been cybercrime’d because you wanted glitter pens.

Anyway, curiosity got the better of me, so I grabbed my old phone and checked the number on Truecaller.

“Saotar Mustafapur.”

Not very helpful, but the Bihar connection was officially confirmed. And I’m not being racist. I’m actually from Uttar Pradesh so trust me I’m allowed to say this.

What made it weirder was:

• no WhatsApp account,
• no UPI ID attached to the number,
• absolutely no digital footprint.

Which, in India, is suspicious because who DOESN’T have a UPI account attached to their main number?

At this point I tried to move on with my life, which wasn’t difficult considering my attention span is impressively twelve milliseconds long.

Until he called again, approximately just ten minutes later.

I ignored it.

Then at 21:30 hours tonight, the number called for the final time.

That’s when I finally reported it.

Now I still don’t know whether:

• this was a scammer,
• some random creep trying to talk to women,
• a prank,
• or genuinely the world’s worst delivery guy.

But it was definitely one of the creepiest phone interactions I’ve had in a while.

Anyway, the day is over and I’m going to sleep now.

But if this number calls again, we may have to escalate matters.

I’ll keep you posted regardless.

It’s not like I have a life or anything.